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Archive for the ‘Celebrities’ Category

Golden Globes Not So Golden

Posted by tvondvdcritic on January 7, 2008


With the Golden Globes set to be presented on January 13th, we might see new meaning in, ‘The show must go on’. With many of the top celebrities and nominees set to boycott the event in support of the writer’s strike, this blogger is more excited than ever to watch an award show (except of course when it comes Grammy time. I can’t wait to see if that mess named Amy Winehouse shows up, let alone wins an award.). How excellent would that be to watch the show and have nobody but bottom of the barrell celebs in the crowd and none of the winners be present? Let’s just hope they don’t have ‘Miss Golden Globe’ girl Rumer Willis accepting all the awards. Everytime I see her she reminds me of the McDonald’s Moon Man for some reason.  I couldn’t miss seeing all the celebs’ fun and games, glitz and glam fest ruined. Who knows, with all the empty seats there is sure to be, you might see me in the crowd next to Blossom and Melissa Joan Hart.



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Let’s Use The Word Celebrity Loosely

Posted by tvondvdcritic on January 2, 2008


I’m not sure what to say about the new ‘Celebrity Apprentice’. These celebrity reality shows are really quite sad if you think about it. Most of the time you get these ‘celebrities’ that were either one hit wonders from 1982, was an extra in some obscure movie, is married to someone semi famous, or a former reality star.

All the celebrities on this show fit my explanation above. You have such people as: Nadia Comenichi, a gymnast from Romania who won a gold medal in the Olympics in the year only God knows when, Lennox Lewis, a former boxing champ, Gene Simmons of Kiss, who is the celebrity this show is whoring out the most since obviously he’s the most successful, and Omarosa, who is a legend in her own head. As for the rest, does it really matter?

I’m not sure what they win, but I know what they lose. Their dignity.


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Another Fallen ‘Star’

Posted by tvondvdcritic on December 31, 2007


Former Lost star Michelle Rodriguez began her 180 day sentence of jail time last week in a detention facility, the same that Paris Hilton was in. First of all, you know your not a very big star if the first statement about your jail time is that you’ve stepped foot in the same spot Paris Hilton has. And second, if she was at all a big star, she would not be in jail for 6 months. What celebrity gets 180 days of jail? Everyone knows money can buy celebrities out of prison, so I’m thinking either she didn’t have enough bribery money (because she doesn’t make top dollar) or even if she did offer up a pretty penny, no one really knew who she was. I mean honestly, she was in Lost for like 7 episodes and that’s her claim to fame? Bai Ling was in an episode of Lost and you know how I feel about her.

And one other side note to add insult to injury, her real name is ‘Mayte”. You learn something new everyday.

Photo source

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Fergie Gets Engaged

Posted by tvondvdcritic on December 28, 2007


Let’s file this one under the ‘who cares’ folder, and understand I’m only writing about this because, well, what else is there to talk about.

With that said, last week Fergie got engaged to ‘Las Vegas’ star Josh Duhamel. Let’s hope that she doesn’t get too excited at the wedding and have another incident happen

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Grey’s Star Ties The Knot

Posted by tvondvdcritic on December 28, 2007


And yet another celebrity wedding I could care less about, Grey’s Anatomy’s Katherine Heigl got married to singer Josh Kelley, aka the man with the biggest fucking nose on the planet. Hopefully he didn’t play at the wedding, as his music is not much more appealing than his nose.

Congratulations Katherine. Your married, your star is rising in Hollywood, and now you can slip into obscurity by making bad date movies like ’27 Dresses’ that people will wish they didn’t spend $24 dollars on when they come out of the theater and be overly paid for your roles. Well done. 

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Move over Firecrotch

Posted by tvondvdcritic on December 28, 2007


Move over Lohan, there’s another irresponsible young adult trying to drink her way to the top of the tabloid talk. Mischa Barton formally of ‘The OC’ was arrested last week when she was pulled over for driving on two lanes, and failing to use her turn signal. Sounds like a typical day for me. When they pulled her over they found she was drunk and in possession of marijuana and on top of that she didn’t have a license.

Despite her lack of work, this is a great way to get her mug back on the cover of magazines.  The exposure for Mischa will do wonders for her ‘career’ and all she has to do is follow in Lindsey’s footsteps. Those are some trashy shoes to fill.

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Spears Trailer Park Reunion

Posted by tvondvdcritic on December 20, 2007


Is the Spears’ family trying to outdue each other in the white trash department? Because Lil Sis is hot on Brit’s tail when it comes to queen of the trailer park. The Zoey 101 star confirmed she’s pregnant at the ripe old age of 16.

Along with the news, Mama Spears’ book, about the ins and outs of good parenting of all things, was postponed for release. A parenting book? How ironic is that.

As far as whos the trashiest Spears, Britney’s had a hold on that for a long time. In fact at the start of the year she was miles ahead, but Lil Sis and Mama made a white trash statement of their own this week. Your move Britney.

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Ashley Tisdale makes a career move

Posted by tvondvdcritic on December 4, 2007


Who cares about Ashley Tisdale? No one! Unless of course you’re a 12 year old girl or a hardcore ‘High School Musical’ addict. I certainly couldn’t care less about her, however after reading an article that she got a nose job, one quote she said stood out to me:

‘I didn’t do this because I believe in plastic surgery. I did this for my health, I literally couldn’t breathe out of the right side of my nose”

I can’t breathe out of my nose sometimes, it’s called allergies, and I didn’t go running to get a nose job. I think she got her words confused. I think she meant to say ‘career’ instead of ‘health’. ‘I did this for my career’.

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Who does Montell Williams think he is?

Posted by tvondvdcritic on December 2, 2007

I love when celebrities have undeserved high opinions of themselves. Montell Williams is a perfect example.

Last Friday, Williams was in Savannah Georgia promoting a new free prescription program for low income people. Agitated about a question asked during his interview, Montell abruptly ended the press conference. Later when the same newspaper returned for an unrelated assignment, Williams approached a high school intern and said, and I quote: “Don’t look at me like that. Do you know who I am? I’m a big star. I can look you up, find where you live, and blow you up.”

Blow you up? Big star?

Does Montell Williams even know who he is? Because the Montell I know is not a big star and certainly couldn’t ‘look someone up’. The ironic thing is if he was to ‘blow up’ this student, in whatever sense of the word he means, she would need the very care of what he was there to promote, free prescriptions for the obvious physical injuries she would incur.

Too bad Montell couldn’t ‘blow up’. And by blow up I mean blow up as a big star. His ego needs it.

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Dancing With The ‘Stars’

Posted by tvondvdcritic on November 28, 2007

As if the finale of Dancing with the stars didn’t prove my point enough, that it’s a freaking popularity contest, one of the professional dancers is threatening to quit the show based on biased fan votes.

I don’t care about the show, I think it’s kinda ridiculous that these ‘celebrities’ (where’s Bai Ling?) go on a show and pretend to care if they win a dancing show. The only reason they want to win is so they stay on the whole season to gain exposure. And one of my reasons I hate the show, is that some of these celebs already have established fan bases and have unfair advantages.

So as I said, I could care less about the show. However, Mel should have won, everyone knows it, and I’m glad that someone within the show is stepping up to make a stand. Maybe if we’re lucky all these controversies will make this show collapse. Unfortunately it doesn’t look like that’s about to happen since the finale got 24.5 million people watching.

I think my Gramma summed it up best about the ridiculousness of the show when commenting on Marie Osmond’s obsurd doll routine, in reference to Marie being Mormon, my Gramma says ‘Does the church allow that?”

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